H/T M Kohl
Saturday, 13 December 2008
At last, the answer to the question most asked in America!!!
FINALLY,
HERE IT IS.
THE ANSWER TO
THE QUESTION WE
HAVE ALL BEEN
HEARING AND
ASKING FOR SO
MANY YEARS!
AND THE ANSWER IS:
YES! 
H/T Shelly
What is a Cat?
1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They’re totally unpredictable.
4. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
5. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
6. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
7. They’re moody.
8. They leave hair everywhere.
CONCLUSION: They’re tiny women in little fur coats.
H/T DML
Light News...
Armour: It's alive. Why don't we have this?
Iron Man Is Jewish. Or this.
Postmen sabotage Christmas: 'Cynical' union orders strike on the busiest day of the year. Trotskyite Rabble. Any postman that goes on strike should be sacked. The way the economy is going there will be plenty of people willing to replace them.
Manchester voters give a resounding NO to Britain's biggest congestion charging zone. Did they really think that people would vote yes!
Man told to wait 11 years for knee replacement. The NHS is an expensive joke.
CV-22s Complete 1st Operational Deployment. Something else we won't get.
Jacqui Smith warns of influx of Zimbabwean refugees into Britain in wake of cholera epidemic. Zimbabwean are more welcome than Jacqui Smith and her ilk.
Bomber Command Memorial Fund reaches £750,000. Great news. A memorial is long overdue.
Mugabe claims cholera was released by the British. Will someone kindly shoot the nutter.
Emergency rescue plan for British motor industry. What motor industry? It's all owned by foreigners.
SAS to take on Taleban 'decapitation' mission after leaving Iraq. Go get 'em.
Victims of Zimbabwean diamond crackdown to be dumped in mass grave. Need anymore reasons why we should send in troops.
Secret rocket-ball weapon may be effective against WMD facilities. Cor!
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SOMALIAN PIRATES ANNOUNCE 30 REDUNDANCIES
In a further sign of the global economic downturn, Somalian pirates have been forced to reduce headcount.
Analysts blame the reduction in retail activity, which in turn has led to less goods being shipped past their top secret hidden pirate base ( in the port of Eyl in Somalia, warehouse B ).
'This has been a difficult decision” commented a one-eyed gang leader, “But we need to realign our structure to cope with worsening market conditions. Arr.”
One pirate, who wished to remain anonymous, said: “This is going to hit my family hard. My only income so far this year has been $400,000 in ransom money. There just isn't any piracy work here now. I'll have to become a plumber. I've heard it pays really well. Arr.”
The IUP ( International Union of Pirates ) has today pledged to lobby governments worldwide to ensure more boats are sent past Somalia, to avoid the death of what was once a booming industry. “Some pirate gangs are not complying with the current employment regulations” said a one-legged union spokesman “when we negotiated for severance packages we meant cash not limbs. It’s just not good enough. Arr.”
H/T DML
Commandos Caught In a Firefight,Dramatic Rescue Earns Silver Star
Dramatic video of U.S. troops caught in a firefight in Afghanistan.
Source: CNN
more here
Friday, 12 December 2008
Video and song of the Day....
..the new and official video for 'There's no one as Irish as Barack Obama' by my friends The Corrigans. What ever your feelings on Barack it is a great song and is being officially released as a single today. See sidebar for how to get it from i-Tunes
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Rules for buying men presents...
Rule 1: When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not matter if he already has one. As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills. No one knows why.
Rule 2: If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy him anything with the word ratchet or socket in it. Men love saying those two words. No one knows why.
Rule 3: If you are really short of money, buy him anything for his car. A 50 cent ice scraper, a small bottle of de-icer or something to hang from the rear view mirror. Men love gifts for their cars. No one knows why.
Rule 4: Rope. Men love rope. It takes us back to Boy Scouts or some other such organisation. Nothing says love like a hundred feet of 3/8" nylon rope. No one knows why.
Rule 5: A new TV remote control to replace the one he has lost. If you have a lot of money buy him the latest all-singing, all-dancing widescreen TV. Watch the smile on his face as he flicks, and flicks, and flicks.
Rule 6: Label makers are nearly as good as cordless drills. Within a couple of weeks there will be labels absolutely everywhere. Men really enjoy using these. No one knows why.
Rule 7: Never buy a man anything that says "some assembly required" on the box. He will be too preoccupied to speak to you for hours and he will always have parts left over.
Rule 8: Men enjoy danger. That's why they love to barbecue. Get him a big gas barbecue. Tell him the gas line leaks. Such excitement! Who wants a hamburger?"
Rule 9: Tickets to a football match are a smart gift. However, he will not appreciate tickets to "Creative Flower Arranging for Beginners." Everyone knows why.
Rule 10: Men love chainsaws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a chainsaw. If you don't know why - please refer to Rule 6 and what happens when he gets a label maker.
Rule 11: It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminium extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must be an extension ladder. No one knows why!
H/T DML
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Bettie Page will be sadly missed.....
You can click this one.
Bettie Page, 1950s pin-up queen, has died.
Light News...
Don't mention the economy! Diplomatic war erupts as Germans savage Brown's 'reckless' recovery plan. It seems that Jerry is now the official opposition in the UK because the Tories are doing f**k all.
Jacqui Smith boasts about knife crime crackdown... but where are the figures to prove it? She is the mostdishonest of all the ministers, and that is no mean achievement.
Gordon Brown 'target of suicide bomb attack'. Who would want to kill dear old Gordon?
Robert Mugabe claims 'there is no cholera' in Zimbabwe. He is doomed.
Secret 'EU President' talks begin as Ireland agrees to vote again. Once again the Bastards in Brussels try to 'conquer' Europe through the back door.
Taleban tax: allied supply convoys pay their enemies for safe passage. WTF!!!!
Armed Services take first big hit in public spending. Once again our forces are betrayed by the REMFs at the MoD and the socialist scum running Britain.
Allies seek power to pursue Somali pirates on land and sea. F**k the UN. Just go after them.
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A nice old story that will make you appreciate family.
My grandmother died in the 50s, but her birthday is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce. The long walks we used to take to the store in town, the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling weeds or washing the sidewalk...
Those gems were all good, but the one I remember most, the jewel in the crown of grandmotherly advice, occurred when I was only about 13. We were sitting in a park having just finished collecting some 40 soda bottles for the deposit money on a beautiful spring day.
She told me that one day, I would find a wonderful woman and start my own family. 'And always remember this thing,' she said. 'Be sure you marry a
woman with small hands.'
'How come, Grandma?' I asked her.
She answered in her soft Newfoundland voice.
'Makes your dick look bigger.'
Kinda brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?
H/T Old Dude
Thursday, 11 December 2008
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