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H/T Liz B
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
A few one-liners part 2............
21. If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…
22. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..
23. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.
24. Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
25. If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
26. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhoea… does that mean that one enjoys it?
27. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
28. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay cheques.
29. Some people are like Slinkies … not really good for anything, but you can’t help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
30. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
31. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
32. Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
33. I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
34. A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.
35. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
36. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with “Guess” on it…so I said “Implants?”
37. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
38. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
39. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says “If an emergency, notify:” I put “DOCTOR”. What’s my mother going to do?
40. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
H/T DML
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1948 Cartoon-2009?...from Rico
This is the ONLY cartoon (outside of Congress and C-Span) that I have watched all year. It is definitley easier on the eyes than Harry Pelosi or Nancy Reid, but it is eerie, too.
What seemed 'wild' and 'crazy talk' in 1948 now seems to have come to fruition under Team Obama and the current political numbnuts running things.
Hmmm...will have to check on the original dates Orwell wrote "Animal Farm" and "1984" after watching this one!!!
And still some people still do not learn from history!!!!!
Don't strike the colours yet mateys!...........from Rico
Sadly, many...if not most of us feel just as described below, namely that the Obamunists have things FUBAR'ed (to use a precise military term that fits the situation EXACTLY).
It is important to remember that despite the constant drumbeat from the Ministry of Truth and the Red Shed - formerly known as the White House - (1) you and I are NOT alone, and (2) as John Paul Jones said
- (before revisionist history stopped teaching the truth and IF it deigned to mention the likes of him at all, it was as an oppresive-aggressive-white-exploiter who 'vicitmized' the poor oppressed to such an extent that their present-day descendents still feel both victimized AND entitled to a compensatory free ride upon our backs as partial expiation for the 'guilt' we all should 'feel'...a hereditary guilt that can never be paid for or expunged; but I digress)
"I have not yet begun to fight!"
To which your bloody-but-unbowed correspondent adds: Forget 'damn the torpedoes'.....
DAMN THEIR EYES AND FIX BAYONETS!
Buck wites:
'I have no clue where this thing is headed. Oscama and Co. have things so f**ked up that nobody even dares to think much less plan for any kind of future. Everywhere you look things are at a complete stand-still while all this wild bullshit about jobs and economic recovery streams out of the propagandist media like so much effluent out of a sewer main. It's coming to the point where most Americans with one or two functioning brain cells are catching on to the sad fact that this whole administration is working to destroy the country....they are enemies of the state. Since they control the legislative process there is no way in hell that this cancer can be "voted out." It's plainly evident that they must be physically dislodged and ejected...I guess that's why that Second Amendment thing was put on the books...a last resort, just in case. Hopefully, if the worst case scenario comes to pass, we can deep six all of the ridiculous, self-destructive legislation that's been hampering things for the last 30 years and go back to some basics that actually make sense, simplify the process and get this thing going again.'
ANALYSTS: CLINTON HAD PHOTO OP WITH KIM JONG-IL LOOK-ALIKE
Analysts speculate if North Korean leader uses lookalikes to hide poor health?
Details . . . . . . . . . STORMBRINGER
Monday, 2 November 2009
One Liners part 1.......
1. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
2. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
3. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
4. Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer.
5. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
6. Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
7. We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
8. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
9. If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.
10. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
11. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
12. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.
13. War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
14. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
15. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
16. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
17. The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
18. Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
19. My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
20. Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
H/T DML
Light News......
Barack and Michelle Obama: Mr&Mrs show irks voters
IDF Woman diagnosed with cancer wants to stay on active duty.
Plane passenger accidentally activates ejector seat - and survives
Barack Obama faces triple election defeat on anniversary
Russia 'simulates' nuclear attack on Poland
Al-Qaeda arms cache discovered in Riyadh
Iranian capital to be moved from Teheran due to earthquake fears
Did President Clinton Meet N. Korea's Kim Jong-il or a Look-Alike?
PREGNANCY Q &A & more!
Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.
Q : I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.
Q : What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.
Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?
Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.
Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word 'alimony' means anything to you.
Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.
Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.
H/T Rico
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Bombs away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..................from Rico
Do the Media and Congress (and most current Democrats) have mothers and fathers who are also brother and sister, or what?
When Obama says this is "the right direction for economy" Scooby and you had better be saying ruh-roh!
- This guy ALWAYS says the polar opposite of the truth and of what he means.
What we are seeing is management of "perspective economics" but nothing tangible to help the economy itself.
- The only 'green shoots' I've been seeing are the weeds sprouting in the driveways and parking lots of vacant homes and commercial complexes in Middle America.
The bankruptcy of CIT Group (Citigroup) will leave a mark. It's going to hurt, too. It will leave a company that will only be able to provide 20% of its previous level of financial services to Middle America. This means:
- higher levels of credit-worthiness will have to be met by small businesses.
- fewer funds will be committed to such loans.
The assets of CIT in bankruptcy are the Middle American loans outstanding. They will be brutalized by the bankruptcty process.
- This will result in a flood of Middle American businesses in turn declaring bankruptcy.
In my opinion, this is the equivalent of carpet-bombing Middle American business, and fits exactly into Obama's war on capitalism.
Tora! Tora! Tora! Bombs away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CHARLIE DON't SURF
Maybe not . . .
. . . but THESE guys did - and it saved their lives.
A True Life episode of "SURF OR DIE" . . . . . . STORMBRINGER
Sunday, 1 November 2009
POLITICS SCHMOLITICS . . .
THIS is more important:
Guess who STORMBRINGER is backing for today's Battle Royal?
Analysis and comment on the Cultural Significance when two Giants of NFL football meet to do battle . . .
. . . STORMBRINGER
On sale now: the New Apex Alpine Ski boot.........
From the guys who gave you the classic Hanson boots......
Buy yours HERE a bargain at $1,295
THE SALUTE JUST WON'T GO AWAY . . .
Liz Cheney was asked about this Thursday by John Gibson at Fox News radio. He said, "Seventeen of the 18 families of the fallen denied Obama his photo-op at Dover,"
I'm not the only one who sees it this way, apparently, and I'm in good company . . .
Liz Cheney's reply at STORMBRINGER
Hockey sticks-eating out-eating..........from Rico
Here are a few "hockey stick" graphs. Fannie Mae delinquencies and an increased FDIC seizure of banks (bank failures) for starters.
- Think CRA, Bawney Fwank, Chris Dodd et al. Think Democrat. Then, you may think like I do, that this really *pucks*
Have a martini before scrolling down. Maybe a couple-three ti many martoonies!
People are not eating out any more. Not like they used to. [Minds out of the gutter, please.] The RPI chart shows the 23rd consecutive month below -zero- or below 'growth' if you will. Bad time to be in the restaurant business...
AND
Speaking of GROWTH, this is a secret photograph of the US Government busily eating YOUR lunch while providing less-than-satisfactory or minimal performance in meeting ANY obligations to YOU Mr & Mrs Taxpayer-sucker (I liked the hyphenation shtik).
- I cannot tell if that is Bawney Fwank on his knees (a favorite position of his I hear) or Nancy Reid. 
The Sunday Best..........
Gullible eager-beaver planet savers by Mark Steyn
Michele Bachmann's Statement on Dede Scozzafava in NY-23: GOP House Leaders Endorse Doug Hoffman!
High street banks to be broken up
Iraq war hero now working in call centre speaks of anger at government
Britain pays child benefit for more than 50,000 children living abroad
Lockerbie bomber defies doctors' prediction of death
Eighth severed foot washes up on Canada's Pacific coast
Three British soldiers shot in the Falkland Islands
Hillary Clinton: Afghanistan vote legitimate even if Abdullah boycotts
Somali pirates argue over hostages Paul and Rachel Chandler
Warmists turn up the heat ahead of the Copenhagen climate conference
MoD sent men to die in ‘unsafe’ helicopter
EU to police drivers with black boxes
Hard fight in the desert, soft targets in the cities
In China lonely workers force sex into open
Homeless carted out of Cape Town and Johannesburg for World Cup
the Clarkypoos bit.........
I’ve got a solution for the rainforest: napalm the lot
and Vicki Butler-Bonkalot........
Mustang UBB 1000
Makes perfect sense!..............from Rico
Reason #1.7 trillion why I am not an Obamunist or a Pelosi (hoccccch-spit-ptuey) Democrat (Communist).
- This only makes perfect sense to the likes of them, their supporters who have sunk below the base level of ignorance and incompetence, or the clinically brain-dead.
Let me see if I understand all this....
IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.
IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER, YOU JUST PLAIN GET SHOT.
BUT, IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET: A DRIVERS LICENSE, SOCIAL SECURITY CARD, WELFARE, FOOD STAMPS, AND FREE HEALTH CARE?
Oh well, sure. That makes sense. 
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THE SALUTE
How is this . . .
Not like this . . . 
. . . or this ? ? ?
STORMBRINGER handles a VERY touchy subject with his own inimitable style . . .
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