Thursday, 10 September 2009
GOLF AND WHAT IT ALL MEANS...............
Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer.
Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins. And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.
Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to play your foul balls.
If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here's a valuable tip: your life is in trouble.
Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.
The term 'mulligan' is really a contraction of the phrase 'maul it again.'
A 'gimme' can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers ...neither of whom can putt very well.
An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how badly you play; it is always possible to get worse.
Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and for no
reason at all you really stink.
If your best shots are the practice swing and the 'gimme putt', you might wish to reconsider this game.
Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too seriously it won't work, and both are expensive.
The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
H/T Shelly
Wednesday, 9 September 2009
Red ink = change..................from Rico
Red ink equals "change" too.
Seriously, what did people actually expect from a dedicated Marxist-Communist anyway?
- It doesn't help that no one in the misadministration of the DOTUS* has even managed a 7-11 convenience store.
Help NOT wanted. Employers are not planning to hire in 4Q 2009, quite the opposite in fact.
- The official 'jiggered' numbers conceal the REAL unemployment rate which is running between 17-20%.
The interest on the national debt is now $1 trillion per year. An 80% tax rate would be needed to pay off the current debt...and Obama and the Democrats (C) want to spend even more money they do not have?
Due to the staggering national debt load, you can expect not only higher taxes but a declining standard of living over the next 10-15 years.
- This will be a "change" we ALL will have to deal with (thanks to you fiddy-two percenters, 'ya ignorant wretches!).
*What do I mean by DOTUS?
Easy.
- Doofus of the United States.
My Personal Work History..........
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it ...mainly because it was a so-so job.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.
Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme.
I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
H/T DML
Back when lunch was less than a buck!
A burger, fries, and a Coke resting on the window of a '55 Chevy
H/T DML
News.........
This little post is for those of you who really remain to be convinced that obama is a radical leftist marxist, e.g., a communist. time to take your heads from your rears.
Army's £114m battle-comms net not up to Afghan demands.
Gen Sir Richard Dannatt 'smeared by Labour'.
Cricket 'helps cut bad behaviour'.
Passengers face new tax to halt rise in air travel.
Huge 600lb bomb found planted in Northern Ireland.
Former CIA agent's hunt for bin Laden in Pakistani badlands.
Russia denies that Arctic Sea cargo ship was carrying missiles to Iran.
Election monitors cry foul as Karzai vote hits 54 per cent.
and finally.........
The UK's Cultural Collapse.
Chrysler's Railroad -
Lovemaking tips for seniors.......
For seniors only…
1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed.
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
4. Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin.
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember.
6. Keep the Polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act.
8. Make all the noise you want... the neighbours are deaf too.
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news.
10. Don't even think about trying it twice.
(In large type so you can read it.)
H/T DML
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TWIN TOWERS 9-11: A First Hand Account - ( Continued )
This is part 2 of this true story - from my good friend who survived this ordeal. I'll let Thane tell it here . . .
- Sean Linnane
The roar of the collapsing building grew and grew into a fearsome sound of pending death chasing us all. I scrambled to my feet. Don’t look back, get up and run. Run for all your worth! I thought.
I ran as fast and as hard as I could into the garage as far back as I could go while being chased by the ever increasing roar of the collapsing Tower. Thick dust rushed in and quickly filled the garage.
We were alive, but trapped underground . . . buried under 110 stories of concrete, for all we knew . . .
. . . so this is it, I thought, This is how it happens. This is how I’m going to die . . .
Read the whole thing . . . STORMBRINGER
Tuesday, 8 September 2009
INSIDE THE TWIN TOWERS - A First Hand Account
Thane Thompson & I served together in the 82d Airborne Division, then later on the same team in Okinawa; 1st Bn, 1st Special Forces Group (Airborne). I lost touch with Thane after he got out. Then years later, one night in Stuttgart, an email from Thane popped up on the us.army.gov service, and this is the story he shared with me. - S.L.
. . . we were at the 20th floor and still descending. An awful explosion roared above. The building shuddered and lights flickered. Everybody flinched, went still, and listened. I listened to gauge the threat. “Was the danger coming closer or receding?” The sound and shaking dissipated. People started moving again. I wondered “what the f*ck was that?” A second explosion in the first tower, I thought. Jesus, that was loud - much louder than the initial impact on Tower 1. Maybe that was the aircraft’s fuel tanks? Could the fuel tanks survive the initial impact? That had to have been a huge explosion in Tower 1 for us to feel that in Tower 2. The thought didn’t occur to me that it could have been a second airplane. 
Too long for a single post, this is Part One of an ongoing series . . . STORMBRINGER
