Thursday, 19 June 2008
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News...
Terrorise the non-believers, orders 'Bin Laden's right-hand man in Europe' after he is freed on bail. The Day Britain surrenedered to Islam. This is an insult to our troops and their families. The Judges should be sent to Afghanistan on a fact finding tour dressed in pink tutus.
Terror chief next to be released on bail. Deport him. Or chuck him over the perimeter fence at Mildenhall so the Americans can 'deal' with him.
Brace yourselves: Bank of England boss warns of low pay rises and soaring bills in a 'difficult year'. Difficult is a bloody understatement.
Geneticaly modified crops 'may be answer to global food crisis'. Stop building houses on farmland. Get rid of the CAP which has caused much of the problems and stop growing oil seed rape and sugar beet.
Ex-soldier repels machete armed robbers. They don't like it up em!!
Baghdad car bomb blamed on Iranian backed Shias. Dubya must make sure that the Iranians do not take advantage of his last few months in power. If they think he will not hit back they will run riot.
Victims' relatives battle to sue UN over Srebrenica massacre. Good. The UN must be held to account for this one.
and more on Zimbabwe.
Zimbabwe TV drops opposition ads. Mugabe must be 'stopped'.
Zimbabwe: wife of Harare's MDC mayor killed. If the West does not step in we will never be taken seriously again. Burma, Sudan and every other murderous regime will know that they can do as they please because we don't care.
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GRANDMAS DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING
Little Tony was staying with his grandmother for a few days. He'd been playing outside with the other kids for a while when he came into the house and asked her, 'Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?'
She was a little taken back, but she decided to just tell him the truth. "It's called sexual intercourse, darling."
Little Tony just said, 'Oh, OK,' and went back outside to play with the other kids.
A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, "Grandma, it isn't called sexual intercourse. It's called Bunk Beds. And Jimmy's Mom wants to talk to you."
H/T Nebraska Bob
A Few more Home Remedies....
1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.
2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.
3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS - -- SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.
4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING
OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.
5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.
6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE -- WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN ' T
MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.
DAILY THOUGHT:
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES -- NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING, BUT THEY BRING A
SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS
H/T Nebraska Bob
Wednesday, 18 June 2008
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