Monday, 23 June 2008
Touché....
A cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street, when a little girl on her new shiny bike stopped beside him.
'Nice bike,' the cop said. 'Did Santa bring it to you?'
'Yes Sir,' the little girl said, 'he sure did!'
The cop looked the bike over and handed the girl a $5 ticket for a safety violation. The cop said, 'Next year, tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of it!'
The young girl looked up at the cop and said, 'Nice horse you've got there Sir. Did Santa bring it to you?'
Playing along with the girl, he chuckled and answered, 'Yes, he sure did!'
The little girl looked up at the cop and said, 'Next year tell Santa the dick goes underneath the horse, not on top!'
H/T Joker
Sunday, 22 June 2008
Marxist Thug 1 - Democracy 0....
Tsvangirai Pulls Out Of Run-Off. Once again violence and corruption have won, while the West sits around too scared to take down a loathsome scumbag like Mugabe. The outcome is that every other tinpot dictator on the continent of Africa, Central America and the Middle East can crush all opposition to their evil rule safe in the knowledge that the 'civilized nations' will never lift a finger to stop them. It is no wonder that Al-Queda and the Islamonazis are spreading across the undeveloped world as Christianity is it full retreat. Thousands of people are about to be starved, beaten, raped or murdered because 'our Governments don't care'.
David Letterman's Top Ten Reasons Why Golf Is Better Than Sex.....
#10... A below par performance is considered damn good.
#9... You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers.
#8... It's much easier to find the sweet spot.
#7... Foursomes are encouraged.
#6... You can still make money doing it as a senior.
#5... Three times a day is possible.
#4... Your partner doesn't hire a lawyer if you play with someone else.
#3... If you live in Florida , you can do it almost every day.
#2... You don't have to cuddle with your partner when you're finished.
And the NUMBER ONE reason why golf is better than sex.....
#1... When your equipment gets old you can replace it!
H/T Jeffrey Nihart
From the Jo'burg Star.....
"The situation is absolutely under control," Transport Minister Ephraim Magagula told the Swaziland parliament in Mbabane. "Our nation's merchant navy is perfectly safe. We just don't know where it is, that's all."
Replying to an MP's question, Minister Magagula admitted that the landlocked country had completely lost track of its only ship, the Swazimar: "We believe it is in a sea somewhere. At one time, we sent a team of men to look for it, but there was a problem with drink and they failed to find it, and so, technically, yes, we've lost it a bit. But I categorically reject all suggestions of incompetence on the part of this government. The Swazimar is a big ship painted in the sort of nice bright colours you can see at night. Mark my words, it will turn up. The right honourable gentleman opposite is a very naughty man, and he will laugh on the other side of his face when my ship comes in."
H/T Thomas Harris
This would make a good ad...'Vanishing Point 2008' with the new Dodge Charger.
H/T William E. Stephens
It's choke your children time....
..LEGO shaped 'snacks'!!! They are real and nutritional!
H/T Thomas Harris
Cool......
"A U.S. F-22 Raptor flies with the British Royal Air Force aerobatic team, The Red Arrows, during a practice flight June 18, 2008, over Langley Air Force Base, Va., for an air show June 20, 2008. U.S. Air Force photo by Staff Sgt. Samuel Rogers"
H/T DML
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