Theo Spark

Monday, 15 December 2008

Tricia Walsh-Smith is Going Bonkers....who is she?

H/T Philip H

A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says, “OK, Mrs. Jones, what’s the problem?”

The mother says, “It’s my daughter, Darla. She keeps getting these cravings, she’s putting on weight, and she’s sick most mornings.”

The doctor gives Darla a thorough examination, then turns to the mother and says, “Well, I don’t know how to tell you this, but your Darla is pregnant — about four months would be my guess.”

The mother says, “Pregnant?!? She can’t be. She has never even been left alone with a man! Have you Darla?”

Darla says, “No mother! I’ve never even kissed a man!”

The doctor walks over to the window and just stares out of it. About five minutes pass and finally the mother says, “Is there something wrong out there, doctor?”

The doctor replies, “No, not really. It’s just that the last time anything like this happened, a star appeared in the East and three wise men came over the hill. I’ll be darned if I’m going to miss it this time!”

H/T DML

'One man with courage makes a majority.' - Andrew Jackson

'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.' - Franklin D. Roosevelt

'The buck stops here.' - Harry S. Truman

'Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.' - John F. Kennedy

And for today's democrats...

'It depends what your definition of 'IS' is?' - Bill Clinton

'That Obama - I would like to cut his NUTS off.' - Jesse Jackson

'Those rumors are false .... I believe in the sanctity of marriage.' - John Edwards

'I invented the Internet' - Al Gore

'The next Person that tells me I'm not religious, I'm going to shove my rosary beads up their ***.' - Joe Biden

'America is--is no longer, uh, what it--it, uh, could be, uh what it was once was...uh, and I say to myself, 'uh, I don't want that future, uh, uh for my children.' '' - Barack Obama

'I have campaigned in all 57 states.' - Barack Obama

'You don't need God anymore, you have us democrats.' - Nancy Pelosi (said back in 2006)

'Bill is the greatest husband and father I know. No one is more faithful, true, and honest than he.' - Hillary Clinton (said back in 1998)

H/T Shelly