H/T Shelly
Sunday, 5 April 2009
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Naval Student....
A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea captain.
"What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?" asked the captain.
"Throw out an anchor, sir." replied the naval student.
"What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?" asked the captain.
"Throw out another anchor, sir." answered the student.
"And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do?" asked the captain.
"Throw out another anchor." replied the student.
"Hold on," said the Captain. "Where are you getting all your anchors from?"
The naval student replied, "From the same place you're getting all of your storms, sir."
H/T DML
TOP TEN INDICATORS THAT YOUR HEALTH INSURANCE HAS CHANGED TO A CHEAPER HEALTH CARE PLAN
(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.
(9) Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."
(8) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
(7) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.
(6) The only item listed under Preventive Care Coverage is "an apple a day..."
(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.
(4) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges," is not a typographical error.
(3) The only expense covered 100% is "embalming."
(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.
AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED A VERY CHEAP HEALTH CARE PLAN:
(1) You ask for Viagra and they give you a Popsicle stick and Duct Tape.
H/T Old Dude
Not that is a 'houseboat'....
1916. "U.S.S. Franklin, used as training ship. Admiral Farragut's flagship
H/T Nebraska Bob
New lyrics........from Rico
Our very own TOTUS has inspired NEW LYRICS to an old venerable tune. Instead of "Hail to the Chief" we can ALL now sing "Hail to the Thief!"
It's appropriate, and actually fits the situation quite well...
Quote.....
"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better." - Anon
H/T DML
The Sunday Best....
Royal Show to be last in its 160-year history. A Sad day for British agriculture.
Three homes Hoon: Iraq war Minister claimed expenses on one home, rented out second ... and lived in third for free. Another crook.
MPs slammed for going on a £70,000 trip to New Zealand...to investigate binge-drinking. Make them repay the money.
MPs 'not trusted' to review their own pay and expenses. They can't be trusted on anything.
Social workers said because I was a soldier, I was more likely to be violent to my own children. Sack the social workers.
Top British judge accuses Human Rights Court of creating ‘federal law of Europe’. We should quit it. We do not need 'human rights' legislation.
REVEALED: How Navy let 99 sailors die to avoid damaging stricken sub. A tragety.
Cartoon strip aimed at under-12s depicts Christian boy as Islamaphobe thug. Revoke their charitable status.
The Wider View: British supercar that's known as the fastest kettle in the world. But does it make tea?
White House apologises after calls to Hillary Clinton were redirected to a sex line. Was it Monica?
North Korea launches missile in 'satellite test'. And no one shot it down.
Nato accused of failures in Afghanistan by head of Britain's Armed Forces. As usual the Anglosphere is doing most of the work.
Hugo Chavez says relations with US unlikely to get better. With his commie chum Obama.
All that G20 pomp will never impress the voters. It didn't fool anyone. It was an expensive joke.
Alistair Darling: I was wrong on recession. So resign.
Gordon Brown’s gang pulls a $1 trillion con trick. And the liberals have bought it.
Runaway scooter carries off woman. WTF! (H/T JMH)
MoD reveals nuclear sub incidents. It's like bloody dodgems down there.
'Lap dancing nun' to perform for cardinals and bishops. What fun.
a bit of Clarkypoos
Fiat Qubo.
and little Jimmy May on Garages
and finally....
Vietnam Marine Receives Silver Star 42 Years Later. (H/T Stormbringer)
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C.O.T.U.S..........by Rico
The COTUS (Commissar of the US) ...you know him, the "yes, we can" (si, se puede) asshole that won the election thanks to a critical mass of SOROS megabucks, ACORN criminal voter fraud, white-librul "guilt" and 52% of the electorate being too stupid to breathe (but able to breed). Yeah, THAT guy.
HE HAS A PLAN.
White is the new black. Given that ALL typical white people are racists, the objective of Team Obama is to cater to certain people by granting lavish benefits at great burden to the working stiff [read: taxpayer]. They will be educated to the exclusion of those with more ability, and given preference in employment to the exclusion of those with skills, talent, and aptitude.
Wondrous plan, that. Worked a treat in Zimbabwe (formerly Rhodesia), just take a look!
BOTTOM LINE: You ofay chuck mofo's CAN NEVER PAY ENOUGH in real money to pay for the intangible priveleges of being white.....naw, that IS racist...let's say for being CAPABLE (as in, having ability-motivation-drive, race/color/creed is not germane unless you're a COMMUNIST talking out of your ass).
And I seem to have mis-placed the family plantation.
Oh.
We never HAD one...
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