Saturday, 7 June 2008
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A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma forseveral months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every singleday.
One day,when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, 'You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, youwere there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?'
'What dear?' she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.
'I think you're bad luck... get the fuck away from me.'
H/T Javatrader
Things you learn living in Texas....part 3
21. You carry jumper cables in your car --- for your OWN car.
22. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony's, Tabasco and Ketchup.
23. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6pages for local high school sports and motor sports, and gossip.
24. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
25. You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm'..
26. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
27. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time know as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World'.
28. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees)as good chicken stew weather.
29. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
30. We don't need no dang driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.
31. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Texas friends and those who just wish they were from Texas.
H/T Nebraska Bob
Friday, 6 June 2008
Steppenwolf - Magic Carpet Ride....
...a little something for the weekend. Cool vid. Dedicated to Neptunus Lex a fine blogging Naval Aviator.
Sunset at Arromanches....
......'At the going down of the sun and in the morning,
WE WILL REMEMBER THEM.'
WE WILL REMEMBER THEM.'
THE FINAL WORD ON NUTRITION....
After an exhaustive review of the research literature, here's the final word on nutrition and health.:
1. Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
3. Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
5. Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
6. The French eat foie-gras, full fat cheese and drink red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us
CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
H/T 45 Govt
The House of Commons debates knife crime.....
...I think this pretty much sums up our 'elected' representatives attutude to law and order.
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Berkowitz, Cohen and Ginsburg have all been close friends since childhood. They decide they want to go into business together.
Berkowitz says, "OK! I'll invest $100,000."
Cohen says that he'll put in $200,000.
Ginsburg says, "All right, I'll put in $1,000."
Cohen says, "If I'm putting in $200,000, I'll be the President and CEO of the corporation. Berkowitz, for your $100,000, you can be the Vice President and CFO, and Ginsburg, for your $1000, you will be our Sexual Adviser."
Puzzled, Ginsburg asks Cohen, "What is a Sexual Adviser?"
Cohen replies, "When we want your f*cking advice, we'll ask for it."
H/T Jeremy
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She Loves A Big Boom......
....a hot shell casing down the front of her shirt is not part of the plan.
She Loves A Big Boom - Watch more free videos
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They should bring back tips like these.....
.....anyone who has driven in Norfolk recently will understand.
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News....
Eight 'clone farm' cows born in Britain - and their meat could be on sale in months. Ok this is not necessary. GM is one thing but cloning is a whole different kettle of fish and should not be used for food prduction.
Army tackles ticking 2,000lb German bomb threatening to blow up Olympics site. Leave it where it is, declare the Olympic site a no go zone and give the Olympics to a country that wants them.
How three super prisons costing £1bn 'will be overcrowded from start'. Bring back the death penalty, deport foreign criminals upon conviction and introduce chain gangs for minor offences.
Zimbabwean generals have 'taken Robert Mugabe's power'. It is now a military problem which means it requires a military solution.
Colonel Bob Stewart: Why Richard Dannatt is right on soldiers' pay. Good words.
Sheep flatulence inoculation developed. I wonder if it works on politicians.
UN food crisis summit leaders fail to agree on plan. Did anyone expect them to?
US troops have tax-free pay but British soldiers get poor deal. Our forces need a massive pay rise and general increase in spending in general.
...also
Worried About a Recession? Don't Blame Free Trade. A good read. (H/T Thomas Harris)
Mahdi Army uses “flying IEDs” in Baghdad. Hill Billy Mortars. An old IRA thing. (H/T DJ Elliott)
George Galloway endorses Obama........
...celebrates terrorism and funnily enough still doesn't like America. Galloway is a traitor and should be shot as one. I would love to see what Obama's reaction is to the endorsement.
Video here.
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Things you learn living in Texas....part 2
11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar..
12. Backwards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'
13. The word 'jeet' is actually a phrase meaning 'Did you eat?'
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH EM.
16. 'No. Jew?' is a common response to the question 'Did you bring any beer?'
17. You measure distance in minutes - e.g. 'it's down yonder about 3 minutes past that fillin station'.
18. You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
19. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
20. You know what a 'DAWG' is.
H/T Nebraska Bob
Thursday, 5 June 2008
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