Thursday, 11 September 2008
Wednesday, 10 September 2008
News...
North Korea's Kim Jong-il fails to show at anniversary parade amid rumours he suffered stroke. I didn't know he had enough brain to have a stroke.
Eichmann abduction chief calls for Israel to kidnap Iranian 'war criminal' Ahmadinejad. Just shoot the little s**t before he starts a war.
John McCain's team mocks Gordon Brown over Barack Obama backing. Brown has always been a loser.
Farmers fear harvest could be the worst since 1968. We haven't even got to the spuds yet.
Silicon Valley answers Bletchley Park's SOS with $100,000 donation. Thanks tho them, but you have to ask why no British Companies have donated.
Junior scientists sacked for using Large Hadron Collider to play conkers:
Two junior particle physicists were dismissed today after using the Large Hadron Collider to smash conkers into each other at near-light speed. Thousands of scientists had arrived in Cern for the big switch on of the world’s largest particle accelerator, only to find that the interns had ruined the equipment by leaving the debris of horse chestnuts scattered everywhere.
One of the disgraced pair told a friend ‘We thought there would be a clear winner, with one conker smashed and the other carrying on going round and round the accelerator. However, all that happened was that they both shattered into a big conkery mess. We spent a few minutes trying to clean the lumps off the detector. But it’s quite difficult to clean a Large Hardon Collider in the dark.’ The young researchers’ case was not helped by them repeatedly calling the billion dollar construction ‘the Hard-on’ collider, and then giggling at the innuendo.
However the research notes of the young scientists showed that they had at least taken some trouble to prepare properly for their experiment, soaking the conkers in vinegar and baking them in the oven. ‘The conkers selected weren’t just ordinary ‘one-ers’ but had beaten many other conkers on the way to this ultimate encounter. Simon claimed his conker was actually a ‘sixty-two-er’’. Previous experiments had included putting conkers in the middle of the road and seeing whose got run over first.
H/T DML
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No Boundaries
Beneath the streetlights of northwest Baghdad's Hurriya neighborhood Multi-National Division - Baghdad Soldiers with Company A, 1st Battalion, 502nd Infantry Regiment grab hold of concertina wire. Soldiers plan to gather up as much concertina wire as they can and use safety cones in its palce whenever possible in an effort to beautify Hurriya. Photo by Sgt. Paul Monroe.
Tuesday, 9 September 2008
News...
Sarah Palin is not such a small-town girl after all. The Dems would do well to avoid pissing her off. H/T Joe
George Bush announces plan to move US troops from Iraq to Afghanistan. Al Queda has moved so must we.
Supermarkets accused of taking advantage of food inflation to increase prices. Surprise, surprise. Supermarkets are all about profit.
Police in crisis after jury rejects £10m terror case. Until we have juries selected on the basis of IQ and education as opposed to a bunch of fools who could not think of a decent excuse to get out of it, our legal system will continue to fail. Some decent judges would help.
Deadly airstrike on school set up by bin Laden friend, Jalal-uddin Haqqani. Good. Keep it up. As usual liberals are wetting themselves over it.
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I just love anagrams, don't you?
Have you noticed that if you rearrange the words 'illegal immigrants' and add a few more letters, it spells out:
'F**k off and go home you hairy faced, sandal wearing, bomb making, benefit grabbing, goat f**king, smelly, rag head bastards'
How weird is that ??
H/T Killem
Monday, 8 September 2008
News....
Contempt, apathy and lies - why Britain is crying out for our own 'pitbull with lipstick'. Melanie Phillips on 'Sarah the Slayer'.
Brown: 'I will not go without a fight'. Defiant PM vows to meet enemies head-on. Deluded Prick.
Reduce net immigration to zero, say MPs. Finally some MPs with balls.
Terror groups developing 'dirty bomb', say security chiefs. No s**t.
Modern Jean de Florette exposes dark heart of French farming. The French really are a bunch of ignorant peasants. Take away the EU subsidies and see how quick they change things.
Hamid Karzai blames Britain for Taliban resurgence. Try looking at Pakistan. If you want to get rid of the poppy crop, try introducing a disease something that kills it naturally. A sort of GM Bio Drug War
Green activists 'are keeping Africa poor'. An effing menace those greens.
The New Football Season......
Opening night party for the Los Angeles Temptation of the all-new Lingerie Football League!
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Thought for the day ..
'Great people talk about ideas
Average people talk about things
Small people talk about other people
And legends, like us, never talk .... we just drink'
H/T M Kohl
A Poem to Start the Week......
Oh, I Wish I'd Looked After Me Tits: By Pam Ayres
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me dear old knockers,
Not flashed them to boys behind the school lockers,
Or let them get fondled by randy old dockers,
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.
'Cos now I'm much older and gravity's winning.
It's Nature's revenge for all that sinning,
And those dirty memories are rapidly dimming,
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.
'Cos tits can be such troublesome things
When they no longer bounce, but dangle and swing.
And although they go well with my Bingo wings,
I wish I'd looked after me tits.
When they're both long enough to tie up in a bow,
When it's not the sweet chariot that swings low,
When they're less of a friend and more of a foe,
Then I wish I'd looked after me tits.
When I was young I got whistles and hoots,
From the men on the site to the men in the suits,
Now me nipples get stuck in the zips on me boots,
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.
When I was younger I rode bikes and scooters,
Cruising around with my favourite suitors.
Now the wheels get entangled with my dangling hooters,
I wish I'd looked after me tits.
When they follow behind and get trapped in the door,
When they're less in the air and more near the floor,
When people see less of them rather than more,
Oh, I wish I'd looked after me tits.
H/T DML
Sunday, 7 September 2008
More F1 Buls**t.....
Hamilton stripped of Spa win. Formula One is crooked as hell. There is one law for Ferrari and another for the rest.
I am not sure this is a good idea......
Meet Evans the Atom, who will end the world on Wednesday.
Recreating the Big Bang may be one scientific 'breakthrough' we can live without.
