Wednesday, 25 November 2009
Every once in a while in life you run into a genius with true talent......
H/T Rodney
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon
THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate
THINGS THAT ARE DOWN RIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. No thanks, I'm married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Kebab? No thanks, I'm not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
7. I'm not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I'd hate to look like a fool!
9. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.
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News..........
Thanks to the Troops!
Another Eurosocialist Success Story -- Paddy Goes A-Begging!
The former British police officer who wants to bring down Barack Obama
CRU Hack/Leak Round-Up #2
4 Lessons Learned From the Health Care Vote On Saturday
All 193% of Republicans Support Palin, Romney and Huckabee
Navy SEALs Face Assault Charges for Capturing Most-Wanted Terrorist
Iraq inquiry: Britain rejected regime change as illegal in 2001
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: US and Israel 'don't have the courage' to attack Iran
Kim Jong-il bans World Cup coverage - unless North Korea win
Jetman attempts first intercontinental flight
US expects Nato to join troop buildup, Pentagon says
Feral camels terrorise Australian Outback community
10 Reasons God Created Eve
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in the garden because men hate to ask for directions.
9. God knew that Adam would one day need someone to hand him the TV remote.
8. God knew that Adam would never buy a new fig leaf when his seat wore out and would therefore need Eve to get one for him.
7. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment for himself.
6. God knew that Adam would never remember which night was garbage night.
5. God knew that if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle childbearing.
4. As "Keeper of the Garden," Adam would never remember where he put his tools.
3. The scripture account of creation indicates Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden.
2. As the Bible says, "It is not good for man to be alone!"
1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched His head and said, "I can do better than that."
H/T DML
LIKE, WOW, MAN . . .
France Shows Off Cutting-Edge Navy Ship in Russia by IRINA TITOVA, AP - Nov 23, 2009
ST. PETERSBURG, Russia – A cutting-edge French warship sailed into St. Petersburg Monday to show off its capabilities to potential buyers in the Russian navy, whose pursuit of an amphibious assault capacity is frightening some neighboring countries.
STORMBRINGER puts this bathtub toy into perspective . . .
- S.L.
Tuesday, 24 November 2009
Things You Can Only Say On Thanksgiving
1. Talk about a huge breast!
2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.
3. It's Cool Whip time!
4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!
5. That's one terrific spread!
6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.
7. Are you ready for seconds yet?
8. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?
9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!
10. Don't play with your meat.
11. Just spread the legs open & stuff it in.
12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?
13. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!
14. You still have a little bit on your chin.
15. How long will it take after you stick it in?
16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.
17. Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!
18. That's the biggest one I've ever seen!
H/T Paul B
It's time for the noon stock market report.
Helium was up.
Feathers were down.
Beef steered into a bull market.
Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose.
Escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Coca Cola fizzled.
Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
Balloon prices were inflated.
Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.
Knives were up sharply.
Sun stocks peaked at midday.
Diapers remain unchanged.
H/T DML
News........
What can Congress do?
Sarah Palin's Going Rogue Book Tour Draws Crowds and Controversy - and Predictable Leftist Demonization
IDF Women
All the News that's fit to bury
Hadley CRU: Leak/Hack Round-Up
Burka Barbie
Climategate: the final nail in the coffin of 'Anthropogenic Global Warming'?
US to present emissions target before Copenhagen
Gilad Shalit 'to be released soon'
Terror threat pushes Timbuktu on to UK travel blacklist
Barack Obama ‘to announce 30,000 Afghan troop increase next week’
Hugo Chavez 'doubts' brutality of Idi Amin
Arrests are being made 'to expand DNA files'
Lula da Silva, Brazilian President, attacked over Ahmadinejad visit
Pakistan tells US that new Afghanistan strategy has exposed its borders to militants
WWII vets: 'This isn't the Britain we fought for'
and finally.......
Doc's Computin' Tips: Security update
"The Holy Gospel of John (Moses Browning)"
1 In the beginning was the 1911, and the 1911 was THE pistol, and it was good. And behold the Lord said, "Thou shalt not muck with my disciple John's design for it is good and it workith. For John made the 1911, and lo all of his weapons, from the designs which I, the Lord, gave him upon the mountain."
2 "And shouldst thou muck with it, and hang all manner of foul implements upon it, and profane its internal parts, thou shalt surely have malfunctions, and in the midst of battle thou shalt surely come to harm."
3 And as the ages passed men in their ignorance and arrogance didst forget the word of the Lord and began to profane the 1911. The tribe of the gamesman did place recoil spring guides and extended slide releases upon the 1911 and their metal smiths didst tighten the tolerances and alter parts to their liking, their clearness of mind being clouded by lust.
4 Their artisans did hang all manner of foul implements upon the 1911 and did so alter it that it became impractical to purchase. For lo, the artisans didst charge a great tax upon the purchasers of the 1911 so that the lowly field worker could not afford one. And the profaning of the internal parts didst render it unworkable when the dust of the land fell upon it.
5 And lo, they didst install adjustable sights, which are an abomination unto the Lord. For they doth break and lose their zero when thou dost need true aim. And those who have done so will be slain in great numbers by their enemies in the great battle. And they didst chamber it for cartridges who's calibers startith with numbers less than the Holy Number 4. And lo the Lord did cause great grief amongst these men when their enemies who were struck in battle with these lesser numbers didst not fall but did continue to cause great harm.
6 And it came to pass that the Lord didst see the abomination wrought by man and didst cause, as he had warned, fearful malfunctions to come upon the abominations and upon the artisans who thought they could do no wrong.
7 Seeing the malfunctions and the confusion of men, the lord of the underworld did see an opportunity to further ensnare man and didst bring forth pistols made of plastic, whose form was such that they looked and felt like a brick, yet the eyes of man being clouded, they were consumed by the plastic pistol and did buy vast quantities of them.
8 And being a deceitful spirit the lord of the underworld did make these plastic pistols unamenable to the artisans of earth and they were unable to muck much with the design, and lo these pistols did appear to function.
9 And the evil one also brought forth pistols in which the trigger didst both cock and fire them and which require a "dingus" to make them appear safe.
10 But man being stupid did not understand these new pistols and didst proceed to shoot themselves with the plastic pistol and with the trigger cocking pistols for lo their manual of arms required great intelligence which man had long since forsaken. Yet man continue to gloat over these new pistols blaming evil forces for the negligent discharges which they themselves had committed.
11 And when man had been totally ensnared with the plastic pistol, the lord of the underworld didst cause a plague of the terrible Ka-Boom to descend upon man and the plastic pistols delivered their retribution upon men. And there was a great wailing and gnashing of teeth in the land.
12 Then seeing that the eyes of man were slowly being opened and that man was truly sorrowful for his sinful misdeeds, the Lord did send his messengers in the form of artisans who did hear and obey the teachings of the prophet and who didst restore the profaned 1911s to their proper configuration, and lo, to the amazement of men they didst begin to work as the prophet had intended.
13 And the men of the land didst drive out the charlatans and profaners from the land, and there was joy and peace in the land, except for the evil sprits which tried occasionally to prey on the men and women of the land and who were sent to the place of eternal damnation or hell by the followers of John.
H/T Liam
THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK:
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
H/T DML
You have a Beaver and no water, no worries........
Here is how the good people at Hill Aircraft Service Ltd. in Prince George , B.C., accomplish a "dolly take-off"!
H/T Dick B
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SARAH PALIN AT FORT BRAGG
This isn't about Sarah Palin . . . it's about the people of Fort Bragg who went to see her . . . 
. . . and the incredible sense of being part of something greater than all of us . . .
. . . including Sarah herself. . .
. . . . STORMBRINGER
Monday, 23 November 2009
Calling All Patriots
Ain't Standin' in Line
"Conservatives nationwide using popular online tool:
"Growing in popularity, a new online social media tool is being utilized by the conservative movement. A calendar format online social networking site. It is providing an effective way to help conservatives promote, organize and coordinate nationwide gatherings. They are looking to increase the crowds at their rallies, protests, fundraisng and townhall meetings using this new marketing concept. It has been dubbed "the twitter for conservatives" :
View My Calendar
Washington Rebel
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