Obama's trip ... tripping or tripe? A few photo-ops will not fool the electorate. Not being Hillary can only get him so far.
Sen. Obama (D-IL); thanking the "troops". Troops!!!
and also
Iraq's Christians form new militias to combat Islamic extremists. Good. It is time that the Iraqi Christians started to pay back the Islamo-nazis for the oppresssion of recent years.
Sunday, 27 July 2008
From DJ Elliott....
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IMPORTANT NOTICE...
'DUE TO RECENT BUDGET CUTS, AND THE RISING COST OF ELECTRICITY, GAS AND OIL THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL HAS BEEN TURNED OFF. WE APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.'
H/T DML
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Three old ladies, Gertrude, Maude, and Betty were sitting on a park bench in Corona Del Mar having a conversation when a flasher approached them from across the park.
The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them and, to their shock, opened his trench coat.
Gertrude immediately had a stroke.
Then Maude also had a stroke.
But Betty, being older and more feeble, couldn't reach that far....
H/T M Kohl
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Government admits losing PM's bucket and spade:
At the end of a week which many observers believed couldn’t get worse for Gordon Brown, it seems that even his plans for a seaside holiday in the genteel Suffolk resort of Southwold are now in jeopardy following the loss of the Prime Ministerial bucket and spade. ‘I’m sure I left it in the back of this cupboard, but I’ve had everything out three times now and looked everywhere. It’s sort of red with shells on, and a blue handle. You haven’t seen it have you?’ said the Prime Minister.
Regarded as one of the perks of office, the sandcastle-making apparatus is part of a beach leisure set used by many former Prime Ministers and their families and is rumoured to go back as far as Churchill. ‘It’s not a case of just buying a new one,’ said Mr Brown, ‘it’s a part of British history and I can’t go on this holiday without it, although it’s not all doom and gloom – I’ve just found the li-lo.’
It is the latest in a series of disastrous losses for the government including discs of benefit records, MoD laptops and voters, but the Prime Minister’s spokesman revealed that this was the thing at the moment causing Mr Brown most concern, and that his wife was asking him to get a move on. ‘To be going on a traditional British seaside holiday that he didn’t want to go on anyway, and to not be able to make sandcastles when you’re there, well, Gordon’s really having second thoughts about it all and making excuses so he can just stay here in Downing Street and ‘work on through…’
The search for the missing bucket and spade, and also Clement Attlee’s old brightly-coloured beach ‘boule’ set, will have to be put on hold for the rest of the day while Barack Obama is in town meeting important leaders as part of his ‘getting to know you’ world tour. But it will resume later tonight with the focus on a cupboard on the fourth floor of Number Ten, which Mr Brown is known to have a ‘lucky feeling’ about. ‘So it’s probably somewhere in the basement’ said an exasperated Alistair Darling.
Mr Darling, who is due to take control of the government while the Prime Minister is away, is carrying out his own search with the help of several cabinet colleagues who are equally insistent that the PM should, ‘in the name of God!,’ go on holiday. However, a Minister called Milliband, who wished to remain anonymous was far more ambivalent about the missing items saying; ‘Well, he’s got his head so far in the sand, to be honest he’d be better off with a digger.’
H/T DML
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The Sunday Best....
Death-crash spy planes are still leaking fuel
They need to be replaced NOW.
European Union abolishes the British acre. Like hell they have.
Why Submarines Still Rule the Sea. H/T DJ Elliott
He ventured forth to bring light to the world. Gerard Baker on Obama.
Red Arrows at Suffolk Air Show. H/T Philip Howells
B-52: lifespan of a raven. H/T DJ Elliott
Russia could place bombers in Latin America, N.Africa. The Cold War is about to make a comeback. Putin is actually nutty enough to start something. H/T DJ Elliott
A Step Back From Enviro Lunacy. Michael Barone on changing priorities. H/T Shelly
I'm an ex-Marine who's lived here for 50 years, so why must I pay £750 to prove I'm British? Once again bureaucrats prove what a waste of time they are.
All air passengers to give their fingerprints ... but is the reason security or simply to raise profits for the duty-free shops? Well it has f**k all to do with security. They will want to microchip us all next.
Fresh blow for Gordon Brown as Conservatives sweep marginals in new poll. He is toast.
Britain 'to move to first and second degree murder charges'. Bring back the death penalty as well.
Iran claims more centrifuges in major expansion of nuclear programme. Iran will get nukes because the West doesn't have the balls to stop them. Our future security rests in the hands of the Israelis.
MPs campaign to make Jack Straw prime minister. That worthless sack of s**t will be worse than Brown.
Barack Obama: He came. He saw. He, er, left. His entire trip was for photo-ops nothing more because he has nothing more.
South Africa tells Robert Mugabe to surrender. This could still get bloody.
Islamist bombers target Olympics. You can expect to see this headline every four years.
Barack Obama’s brother pushes Chinese imports on US. I wonder if this story will make it to the US media?
Huge Amount Of Fossil Fuels In Arctic: 90 Billion Barrels Of Oil And 1,670 Trillion Cubic Feet Of Natural Gas. Better get there before the Russians.
and the Clarkypoos bit.
By ’eck, our funny accents are the envy of the world.
Ford Kuga 2.0 TDCi Titanium
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The Wisdom of Will Rogers.....
1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.
4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
5. Always drink upstream from the herd.
6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral:
When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
H/T Jeffrey Nihart
Mother Superior and her chief assistant nun had been out on missions of importance, riding their bicycles through the narrow streets of the small European village. Suddenly they realized they'd be late for dinner if they did not hurry back to the compound. Racing through the streets they took a short cut through an alley-way paved irregularly with old rocks.
The younger nun yelled forward, "Gee, I've never come this way before!" to which Mother Superior answered, "It must be the cobblestones!"
H/T HJB
WHY YOU DON’T SEND WOMEN TO THE HARDWARE STORE
One Saturday morning, Charlie was fixing a cabinet door. He found that he needed a new hinge to replace one, worn out. He sent his wife Bev to the local True Value. Once she arrived, she began walking up and down aisles filled with bewildering “stuff.” Bev saw a beautiful satin looking, bathroom faucet while she was waiting for Walt, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer.
When Walt was finished, Bev asked “How much for that faucet?” Walt replied, “That’s pewter and it costs $300.” “My goodness, that sure is a lot of money!” Bev exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Charlie had sent her to
buy, and Walt went to the back room to find it.
From the back room Walt yelled, “Bev, you wanna screw for that hinge?”
Bev replied, ”No, but I will for the faucet.”
AND THAT......is why you can’t send a woman to the hardware store.
H/T M Kohl
Martha recently lost her husband.
She had him cremated and brought his ashes home.
Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the patio table.
Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him....
"Herman, you know that dishwasher you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money!"
She paused for a minute tracing her fingers in the ashes then said, "Herman, remember that car you promised me? Well, I also bought it with the insurance money!"
Again, she paused for a few minutes and while tracing her fingers in the ashes she said, "Herman, that diamond ring you promised me? Bought it too, with the insurance money!"
Finally, still tracing her fingers in the ashes, She said, "Herman, remember that blow job I promised you?"
"Here it comes."
H/T DML
Saturday, 26 July 2008
Theo's Movie Review.. Charlie Wilson's War....
..Great film. I don't know how true to life it is but another great prefofmance from Tom Hanks. This is the guy from 'Bachelor Party and 'The Money Pit'. I think he will be remembered as one of the best actors of his generation. I cannot think of many of the present generation who can act and still manage a 'star' status. All the others seem to rely on the scandal sheets for their publicity.
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