Friday, 4 April 2008

Cannonical Murphy's Laws of Combat....part 5

101. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.

102. The more stupid the leader is, the more important missions he is ordered to carry out.

103. The self-importance of a superior is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness).

104. There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.

105. Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the General is watching.

106. The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.

107. Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight, your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away, and your canteen always lands at your feet.

108. As soon as you are served hot chow in the field, it rains.

109. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do

110. The seriousness of a wound (in a fire-fight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.

111. Walking point = sniper bait.

112. Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.

113. If only one solution can be found for a field problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.

114. Radios function perfectly until you need fire support.

115. What gets you promoted from one rank gets you killed in the next rank.

116. If orders can be misunderstood they will be.

117. Odd objects attract fire. You are odd.

118. Your mortar barrage will put exactly one round on the intended target. That round will be a dud.

119. Mine fields are not neutral.

120. The weight of your equipment is proportional to the time you have been carrying it.

H/T J M Heinrichs

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