Sunday Totty....

H/T M Kohl

The Royal Corps of Seamstresses....

THE VICE GUIDE TO TRAVEL - Gorillas in the Midst - Part 2 of 3

Pearls of Wisdom....

1. When I was born, I was given a choice - A big dick or a good memory. I don't remember, what I chose.

2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.

4. Impotence: Nature's way of saying 'No hard feelings...'

5. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together.

6. Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.

7. There are three stages of sex in a man's life: Tri Weekly, Try Weekly, and Try Weakly.

8. Virginity can be cured.

9. Virginity is not dignity, its lack of opportunity.

10. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small.

12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

13. Q: What's an Australian kiss?
A: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under.

14. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing......

15. Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.

16. Despite the old saying, ' Don 't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!!


H/T Shelly

Bedtime Totty...

Sunrise over the Pacific......as seen from space.

H/T Peter Gunn

THE VICE GUIDE TO TRAVEL - Gorillas in the Midst - Part 1 of 3

I think that a write off....

Saturday Totty...

Blog of the Day....

Micky's Muses. Another great Kiwi blogger.

News...

Zimbabwe: Carter And Annan Turned Away. Good. Zimbabwe has enough problems without those two assholes interfering. Until Mugabe is removed nothing will change.

Pirates Warn Against Armed Attack. Pirates v Seals and SBS. Should be a fairly short contest.

Final insult: Now public faces paying millions to provide Baby P's mother with a new identity. Don't let the bitch out of prison. Better still hang her.

British terror suspect 'killed in US airstrike' in Pakistan. Scratch another one.

The BBC was too scared to sack Jonathan Ross, so the obscenity goes on. People should join together and stop paying the licence fee. They cannot prosecute everyone.

Alistair Darling - you'll make things even worse. Darling is a marxist muppet.

Chavez accused of behaving like 'dictator' ahead of elections. He is a bloody dictator.

Jodrell Bank telescope 'was secret nuclear missile warning system'. It will be again if Obama scraps missile defence.

Prince William joins special forces for Caribbean training. Send him after the pirates.

Only drastic action will save us, says Brown. A general election would be a good start so we can get rid of him and the rest of the socialist scum.

The 20 greatest car chases in movie history. A good choice.

Mahdi Army warns of new insurgency in Iraq if US troops stay until 2011. And they will get their asses kicked again. Al Sadr should have been neutralised years ago.

and finally.

Man Up. Jules has been checking out his manhood!!

Bedtime Totty...

H/T Toni M

Cartoon round-up...by Mark Scott

The Perfect Location for Blogging....

H/T Peter Gunn

H/T DML

Site of the Day....(NSFWish)

Much better than the electoral map.




Click pic to see more.



H/T Old Dude

Looks like my local....

H/T DML

Peter Schiff Was Right 2006 - 2007

His economic predictions were right.



H/T Shelly

Friday Fillies...

News....

Faux Coconut. Jules has gone nuts.

Darling threatens to FORCE banks to lend to firms and families. Asshole. You can't lend money to prople who can't afford to repay it. That's how we go into this mess.

Fury over £100million plan for hundreds of gipsy sites across the country. Ridiculous.

Uproar at Cambridge University as student magazine puts topless blonde on page three. Great idea.

Outrage as the BBC says Ross is now in the clear. Another nail in the BBC's coffin.

Even with Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama will find Middle East peace elusive. Peace in the Middle East is a fantasy.

Bonanza for jobs, but only in public sector. More expensive non-jobs. The Socialist State is expanding at an alarming rate.

Human rights laws prevent 19 terror suspects from being deported. The Human Rights Act must be repealed. It was introduced by lawyers for the benefit of lawyers.

One in eight pubs could close over next three years as recession bites. The smoking ban hasn't helped either.

National Intelligence Council report: sun setting on the American century. Let's hope not.

Iran 'has enough uranium to build a bomb'. As predicted. We are failing to stop Iran's nuclear ambitions and the world is going to be a far less safe place as a result.