'Chocolate tax' to tackle obesity. Fat chance!!
Women joining Chelsea pensioners. Not sure this is good.
Muslim protester who branded our troops murderers is baggage handler at Luton Airport. An islamonazi handling baggage at an airport. What ever happened to security vetting.
Freed to wage war on British troops: Guantanamo prisoner is now a Taliban chief. And Obama wants to shut the place.
UK to have Europe's biggest population: Migration will force us ahead of Germany, says UN. Not if we stop letting people in! We should also start removing those who hate Britain.
Internet ad tracking system will put a 'spy camera' in the homes of millions, warns founder of the web. Peeping toms.
House prices 'could drop another 55%' and leave Britain bankrupt. The media do like to scare the s**t out of people.
Get Shorty! The tiny pony who keeps sparking 999 calls ... because people think she's stuck in the mud. Ahhhhhh....
Gulf War pilot sacked for letting footballer on flight deck was on final warning for stripping to underwear. Pablo and that tache are legendary. The airline obviously have no idea what PR is.
Only surviving WWII Hurricane crash-lands... six weeks after its £1.5million three-and-a-half year restoration is completed. Bugger. Thankfully it is not that serious.
Bright schoolchildren take back seat to 'social misfits', says head teacher. Bring back the birch.
Number of world billionaires slumps by a third. Oh dear!!!!!
Democrats draw up plan for second stimulus bill. If at first you don't succeed, go f**kup again.
Man charged with gyrocopter murder of hunt follower. Hang him.
North Korea to launch satellite in early April. This could get interesting.
Civil servants and ministers spend £1billion on consultants. Get rid of the civil servants and ministers who obviously cannot do their jobs. How many of them will end up as 'directors' of the consultants companies?
Overvalued euro set to plunge 'within months'. And the EU will fall apart.
Fire service 'not prepared for major terror attack'. So let's tell everyone about it. How effing stupid are our MPs?
Celebrity chefs' recipes under fire for high saturated fat content. And they all taste great.
Bernie Ecclestone divorced by wife as he faces £2.4 billion battle over his fortune. That's a lot of money.
Luton parade protesters 'were members of extremist group'. Deport them immeadiately.
White House lawn could be turned into a vegetable patch. No watermelon jokes!!!!
Iranian TV show scrapped after child calls toy monkey Ahmadinejad live on air. Imadinnerjacket's 'popularity' is in decline. Hopefully terminal.
Barack Obama says Darfur violence is "not acceptable". Neither is the situation in Zimbabwe but Obama will do nothing to end both problems except spout meaningless platitudes to the press.
Gordon Brown looks to Barack Obama to rescue demoralised Labour Party. That should finally finish off Labour.
Solar panels in the Sahara 'could power the whole of Europe'. And what religion dominates the Sahara? Does Europe really want to be beholden to Islamonutters for their power?
and finally.....
Council spends £6,000 fitting sat navs to lawnmowers.
It has just been reported that the head gardener at The White House has been dismissed after 28 years of loyal service to the many US presidents.
When interviewed the gardener protested his innocence and said "All I
know is I was walking past the Oval Office and I asked, "Has anyone seen the spade or the hoe?" The next thing I knew I was fired.
H/T Nebraska Bob
The "media" still feels that 'tingle running up their collective legs' and would have us believe that Obama (aka Fearless Leader, aka Big Brother...well you get the idea) still basks in the glow of 110% popular support, along with the party known to some of us as DemSoc.
Not exactly.
The recent (yesterday?) Rasmussen Poll indicates that 77% of Americans feel that Government DOES NOT do the will of the people. The breakdown:
- 63% agree it does not
- 14% aren't sure
- 23% disagree, thinking gooberment 'cares' and is responsive to the people
This might explain the popularity of having "Tea Parties"...but does not explain WHY voters keep electing these people instead of jailing them, or better yet hanging them from trees.
I guess we'll have a clearer idea of where things stand by tax day (April 15th) when the teabags are scheduled to land in Washington.
- As the late great Frank Zappa said: "There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life." To which I might add: "It's concentrated in government, and those who have more faith in government than themselves." [I said that]
1) - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6)
2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)
3) - If you are surrounded by ocean you are an Island . If you don't have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne , age 7)
4) - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson . She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)
5) - A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy, age 8)
6) - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men, a woman and some pots and comes back with crabs. ( Millie, age 6)
7) - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would have been better off eating beans. (William, age 7)
8) - Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful and I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant? Like, really? (Helen, age 6)
9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)
10) - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers at night. (Christopher, age 7)
11) - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. (Kevin, age 6)
12) - Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky, age 8)
13) - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water fired right up her big fat butt. (Julie, age 7)
14) - The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't drown I don't know. (Bobby, age 6)
15) - My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean. What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom. (James, age 7)
H/T Old Dude
On the Obama 'gifts' to Gordon Brown. This is good.
also Credit agency names 283 US firms most likely to go bust. Probably not the most helpful thing to do in the present climate.
Attention All Manchester, NH KFC Employees (and all you other fast food employees that took the little yellow bus to school):
If you get a phone call from someone telling you they’re from corporate headquarters, and you need to test the fire suppression system, that’s usually fine. No need to ask a lot of questions.
If they ask you to test it by having each of you stand underneath it, covering yourselves in hazardous chemicals, time to ask some questions.
If after all that, you tell them the chemicals are irritating your skin, and they advise you to go outside, in the cold, and take off all your chemical-covered clothes and stand behind the building naked… well, it should have sent up some red flags.
It definitely should not have taken them telling you - as you stand naked, shivering in the New Hampshire cold, phone still in hand - to pee on each other to stop the irritation, for you to have realized that maybe that wasn’t HQ on the phone after all.
I thought we settled all this when they trained you not to go fishing in the fryer with your bare hands anymore to clean out the little burned off pieces of chicken you find so delicious.
I know the news report said you were “cooperating fully” with the criminal investigation, but it’s obvious cooperating fully is not your problem. You are excellent at cooperating fully. It’s comprehending fully we need to work on.
Check out the video report here. The Fire Chief trying to keep a straight face through his interview is classic.
H/T DML
Will someone kindly add 'taste in music' to basic training. The misic in this is dire.
Special relationship? Obama's people won't even answer the phone, whines Downing Street. Just wait 'til they need our help.
Home from the war... and our troops are greeted by abuse from Muslim protesters. Throw them all out. Apparently people were chucking bacon over the protesters.
Hospitals spend less on their patients' food than prisons on their inmates. The NHS continues to be an expensive joke.
Sorry, it's too wet for swimming: Health and safety close outdoor pool because of rain 'risk'. Only in Britain.
Barack Obama rejects accusation that he is taking on too much too soon. Waaaay too much. He should take a break, preferably for about 4 years.
Robert Mugabe attends funeral for rival Morgan Tsvangirai's wife. Gloating that he has ruined his rivals life.
Soldiers targeted by Muslim extremists in Luton will march again in Watford. Let them take loaded weapons this time.
Family of Gurkha killed in Afghanistan allowed to live in Britain. And so they should.
Dalai Lama: China has created 'hell' in Tibet. Yup. No one is going to do anything about it though.
Monkey 'kills cruel owner with coconut thrown from tree'. Hee hee.
‘Difficult’ Americans hamper G20 efforts to secure a global deal. A global solution is not going to be the answer. Individual nations have different problems and need different solutions.
F1 chief Max Mosley may still sue News of the World over 'Nazi orgy' claim. And he will lose.
Nicolas Sarkozy ignores enemy fire as he marches France back into Nato. There goes the neighbourhood.
I have no doubt that they make a great rifle, but best in the world?
Check out their basic site at Accuracy International
Once again this applies to the UK.
Bottom-line is that Government-run schools have been a failure since the 70's. The Teacher's Union (NEA) wields enormous union power. Like ALL unions in the US today, they are under-worked, unproductive, and over-paid. They also kill the golden goose that employs them as a rule (look at the UAW and Detroit's former Big-3 automakers).
- It's "easier" to teach at the lowest common denominator, too. While there 'used to' be harder classes taught to college-bound students, those were a lot of work for both teachers AND students. Educators AND students are happier when there are NO expectations and NO work...the teachers get paid more money for easier work and the students have more free time to sit on their butts and smoke dope and/or play video games...who NEEDS to learn Latin, a foreign language, or ANYTHING (the 3r's, history, civics, et al)? The power switches on GameBoy and the cell-phone are clearly marked "on" and "off" right? Who needs to understand Plato's Republic or a play by Shakespeare? The rapper 50-cent is much more accessible.
- The more money plowed into "education" the worse it gets (law of diminishing returns).
- Jimmuh Carter's establishment of the Department of Education sealed the deal. Schools no longer teach the three R's, or even any kind of basic competency/literacy...the JOB of a government-run school and the Teachers UNION is now to produce ignorent and helpless "good little socialist voters" that will need the government to think FOR them, since they will lack the capacity for critical thought or problem solving. IF SCHOOLS PRODUCE VOTERS DUMB AS A WET ROCK, THE CLOWNISH POLITICIANS ARE VERY SAFE IN THEIR JOBS. Whatever lies the fans of Marx & Lenin tell the public will be 'believed' because the "leaders" say it's so (and besides, they also read it in the papers and see it on the TV news). You can understand why "The Fairness Doctrine" (read: stifle dissent) is now being pushed for by the Communists (D) now running things.
- Lowering the standards so EVERYONE can feel good even if they cannot understand or perform any of the skills/subjects and just sit on their ass (give them all A's for F work, or better, just a non-judgemental "pass" for failing work) instead of raising the bar so those who work hard, master the skill/subject and thus succeed ...and can look at their accomplishment with pride and go on to apply this to their future productive lives is another "librul" fantasy. I'll stop ranting now, but punish the successful and reward the morons is a pretty apt definition of Socoialism/Communism in my book.
IF life were to be looked at as a foot race, the ONLY way to achieve equal-and-fair results is to hold back the fleet-of-foot and make them run only as fast or as far as the slowest in the race.
Quotas and set-asides for 'minorities' instead of admissions predicated on performance/merit do not help any. Reverse discrimination against the melanin-challenged in favor of the poor oppressed melanin-rich is another "progressive" fantasy like wealth-redistribution.
Life is NOT "fair"...neither is Darwinian selection... but rewarding the inept/incapable/non-performing and punishing the talented/capable/performing never works.
Sorry to "rant" but this reminded me of a double-MA degree holder who could NOT write a coherent sentence in his native language, but was convinced he was 'smart' because that's all he was ever told (and besides, he had the Certificates that 'proved' it).
God help us...George Romero may have been on to something after all! There are now masses of brain-dead zombies all around us thanks to decades of liberal-progressive idiocy and they are called Communists (whether they are the Politicians or the 52% who voted for ObaMarx).
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