H/T DML
Friday, 21 November 2008
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News....
Faux Coconut. Jules has gone nuts.
Darling threatens to FORCE banks to lend to firms and families. Asshole. You can't lend money to prople who can't afford to repay it. That's how we go into this mess.
Fury over £100million plan for hundreds of gipsy sites across the country. Ridiculous.
Uproar at Cambridge University as student magazine puts topless blonde on page three. Great idea.
Outrage as the BBC says Ross is now in the clear. Another nail in the BBC's coffin.
Even with Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama will find Middle East peace elusive. Peace in the Middle East is a fantasy.
Bonanza for jobs, but only in public sector. More expensive non-jobs. The Socialist State is expanding at an alarming rate.
Human rights laws prevent 19 terror suspects from being deported. The Human Rights Act must be repealed. It was introduced by lawyers for the benefit of lawyers.
One in eight pubs could close over next three years as recession bites. The smoking ban hasn't helped either.
National Intelligence Council report: sun setting on the American century. Let's hope not.
Iran 'has enough uranium to build a bomb'. As predicted. We are failing to stop Iran's nuclear ambitions and the world is going to be a far less safe place as a result.
Lance Cpl. Kenny Wilson of Kingston Upon Hill, British Territorial army, 4th Battalion, Yorkshire Regiment, draws a crowd of children during an International Security Assistance Force patrol around Kabul, Nov. 16. ISAF is assisting the Afghan government in extending and exercising authority and influence across the country, creating the conditions for stabilization and reconstruction. Photographer: Tech. Sgt. Laura Smith, International Security Assistance Force HQ Public Affairs.
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Thursday, 20 November 2008
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Great Lines from and for Governments ......
In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. - John Adams
If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed. - Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress; but then I repeat myself. - Mark Twain
I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. - Winston Churchill
A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
- George Bernard Shaw
A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. - G Gordon Liddy
Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. - James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries. - Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it. - Ronald Reagan (1986)
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. - Will Rogers
If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free! - P. J. O'Rourke
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire (1764)
Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you! - Pericles (430 B.C.)
No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
- Mark Twain (1866 )
Talk is cheap...except when Congress does it. - Anon
The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other. - Ronald Reagan
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery. - Winston Churchill
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. - Mark Twain
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. - Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
There is no distinctly Native American criminal class... save Congress. - Mark Twain
What this country needs are more unemployed politicians. - Edward Langley, Artist (1928 -1995)
A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson
H/T Jeffrey Nihart
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Wednesday, 19 November 2008
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Today's Challenge......Find the Video this still came from.
It's Sophie Monk for a starter......
Ooooh look what I found
Barclaycard water slide spoof......
An awesome spoof commercial of the Barclaycard ad by Specsavers.
And the original for those who haven't seen it.
News...
Iranian grain ship seized as Somali pirates hold world to ransom. Time to start bombing the bastards in their home ports. The profits are going to terrorists and theirfore they are perfectly legal targets.
Hijacked supertanker anchors off Somali coast as pirates open talks over their $100m oil haul... and demand a $10m ransom. The Saudi's will probably cough up.
India 'sinks Somali pirate ship'. And the Indians show how it's done.
Somali pirates try to seize British ship. Time to arm merchant ships in the area with mini-guns.
Head Won't Go For Baby P Mistakes. An apology is not enough. People must be sacked for their incompetance.
Hundreds die of cholera in Zimbabwe. The situation is getting beyond help. Still the west does nothing.
Russia to build nuclear reactor for Hugo Chavez. More shit stirring from Putin. Can't wait to see what happens whn Raul Castro visits Moscow soon.
Britain re-establishes high-level intelligence links with Syria. Why? Syria cannot be trusted.
Lawyers gather as last six fight over Senate superpower. It's always the bloody lawyers. They should not be allowed near politics.
300,000 UK visas 'wrongly issued'. Is there a single brain cell in the Home Office?
Video: Negotiations with Attractive Girls Union break down.
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No Hard Feelings.
The election day is over,
The talking is done.
My party lost,
Your party won.
So let us be friends,
Let arguments pass.
I’ll hug my elephant,
You kiss your ass.
H/T DML
Tuesday, 18 November 2008
Pilot conversations...
Speedbird 206: " Frankfurt , Speedbird 206! Clear of active runway."
Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven."
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, -- And I didn't land."
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A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich , overheard the following:
Lufthansa: "Groundcontrol, wie spät können wir los?"
Ground: "If you want an answer you must speak in English."
Lufthansa: "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany . Why must I speak English?"
Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war!"
H/T Herve
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Light News...
Celebrities join BBC backlash after Brand and Ross scandal as more and more ask 'why SHOULD we pay licence fee'? The TV licence must go. 10% of what the BBC produces is worldbeating, the rest is garbage.
Foreign Secretary Miliband set to meet Syrian President. 'Boy Assad' meets 'Boy Blunder'. Sucking up to the Syrians will get us nowhere.
Somali pirates open talks for release of hostage crew on oil tanker Sirius Star. If we do not sweep these piratical scum from the seas hijackings will become widespread as our enemies will know we have lost our 'balls.'
Navies consider their response to hijacking of Sirius Star off Somalia. Take out their home ports.
Million violent crimes a year, but fewer than half are solved. Just what do the police do all day?
Convoy brings winter relief to Nato forces. Good. Our troops need all the kit they can get.
Hugo Chavez faces toughest political test ... against his ex-wife. Let's hope she kicks his butt.
A Few Thoughts....
I had amnesia once - or twice.
Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
If the world was a logical place, men would ride horses sidesaddle.
What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
They told me I was gullible .. And I believed them.
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to edge his car onto a motorway.
Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long.
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to look
Like a nail.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
How can there be self-help "groups"?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
Is Marx's tomb a communist plot?
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
It's not an optical illusion. It just looks like one.
Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
H/T Don Emslie
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