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MORE PICS HERE
H/T JM Heinrichs
Wednesday, 17 December 2008
News...
UN approves piracy land pursuit. The UN finally does something semi-useful.
Chicago Tribune Stopped Working With Prosecutors, Forced Arrest of Ill. Gov. Too Early. The media are a menace.
Baghdad shoe attacker nurses a broken arm and ribs. Good.
How the 'cash-strapped' BBC spent £160,000 on parties for its stars. Another reason to get rid of the TV licence.
'The economy is f***ed' says Virgin boss Sir Richard Branson as tycoon slams greedy bankers. And he is right.
Scrap the buffet car? That's off the rails. So much for customer service.
Private schools told: open to poor or face closure. More class war bullshit from Labour.
Darfur civilians 'seized as slaves by Sudan military'. Another tragedy ignored by the west.
ANC defiant as breakaway party names Mosiuoa Lekota its leader. The ANC fighting amongst themselves, should get interesting.
Brown sets summer date for British troop pullout from Iraq during Baghdad visit. If he thinks this will keep the unemployed figures off the news he is mistaken.
Why is the State so utterly incompetent?. Because it is so big and totally unaccountable.
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Government Travelers –
A Washington , D.C. , airport ticket agent offers some examples of why the country is in trouble!
'I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.'
I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight, and the passport information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts ." Without trying to make her look stupid, calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts ; Capetown is in Africa ," Her response - click.
An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am, and got to Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?"
A lady Senator called, and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , Florida , on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever, smarty!"
A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state!"
I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada ?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."
I suspect that they were all Democrats!!
H/T Govt 45
Tuesday, 16 December 2008
An effing disgrace.....
Forces stick with Snatch vehicles. Just proves that the government doesn't give a flying f**k about our troops. Brown has enough blood on his hands already without condeming more British troops to die in these death traps.
For great analysis of this go to Defence of the Realm.
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News...
Blind man's guide dog barred from restaurant for offending Muslims. Oh f**k Islam.
British Prison Bans Crucifix From New Chapel to Avoid Offending Muslim Inmates. Christianity had better start fighting back.
Efficiency drive cost tax payers millions. Everything the government does gets screwed up and costs us millions. Yet again no-one will pay for this mess with their job.
Britain faces worst recession in living memory, Cabinet minister Tessa Jowell admits. And who's fault is that? She rivals Jacqui Smith as the most stupid slapper in government.
Boost for homebuyers as Brown attacks 'nasty' Tories. More creative accounting from Brown. Using taxpayers money to help taxpayers!!! Why not get rid of the taxes and let people spend their own money. We tend to better at it than the government.
Zimbabwe air force head 'wounded'. Well it's a start. How long before Mugabe gets the message and flees.
Gold-plated pensions fiasco: 100,000 NHS and armed services personnel overpaid for decades face cut. More Whitehall incompetence. The senior civil servants should be sacked. But they won't be.
British Scout leaders forced on five-day trek through jungle after hippo sank canoe. Now they know why the Scout's motto is 'Be Prepared'.
SAS deaths 'less likely' if forces properly equipped. The government should be charged with 'corporate manslaughter' for sending troops into battle with out the right kit. Brown must be made to pay for his betrayal of our forces.
Zimbabwe cholera deaths soar to 978. It is getting worse.
Alexander Litvinenko murder suspect says traitors should 'be exterminated'. The KGB is back in the murder business.
US accuses Britain over military failings in Afghanistan. Brown is fighting a war on the cheap. Our lads are the best but need much more support from the government. We must double the size of our army because this war isn't going away.
Robert Mugabe threatens Botswana for ‘plotting to overthrow him’. He is toast. It is no longer if but when he gets ousted.
Forget naked jam makers - prisons are the surprise calendar hit for 2009. Not amongst our readers.
Thief stole police car after arrest. Like to see Plod explain that one.
Mumbai attackers also 'thieves'. Thieving murdering scum.
Do you know what happened back in 1850, 158 years ago?
California became a state.
The State had no electricity.
The State had no money.
Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
There were gunfights in the streets.
So basically, it was just like it is today, except then women's breasts were real and the men didn't hold hands.
H/T Jackie Gedling
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Now that was a cold year.......Niagara Falls frozen
...according to Snopes it was probably 1912.
H/T Peter Gunn
NEVER ASSUME THAT MEN UNDERSTAND.
A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months.
Nurses were in her room giving her a bed bath. One of them was washing
her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the
monitor whenever she touched her there. They tried it again and sure
enough, there was definite movement.
They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, 'As
crazy as this sounds, maybe a little '0ral sex' will do the trick &
bring her out of the coma.' The husband was skeptical, but they
assured him that they would close the curtains for privacy.
The husband finally agreed and went into his wife's room. After a few
minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate. The
nurses run back into the room. 'What happened!?' they cried.
The husband said, 'I'm not sure; maybe she choked.'
H/T Rodney
Monday, 15 December 2008
Richard Nixon, Jimmy Carter, and Bill Clinton are on the Titanic.
When it starts to sink Carter yells, “Quick, save the women and children!”
Nixon: “Screw the women and children”
Clinton: “Do we have time?”
H/T DML
Poem of the Day....
Goodbye to my England, So long my old friend
Your days are numbered, being brought to an end
To be Scottish, Irish or Welsh that's fine
But don't say you're English, that's way out of line.
The French and the Germans may call themselves such
May Norwegians, the Swedes and the Dutch
You can say you are Russian or maybe a Dane
But don't say you're English ever again.
At Broadcasting House the word is taboo
In Brussels it's Scrapped, in Parliament too
Even schools are affected, staff do as they're told
They must not teach children about England of old.
Writers like Shakespeare, Milton and Shaw
The pupils do not learn about them anymore
How about Agincourt, Hastings , Arnhem or Mons
When England lost hosts of her very brave sons.
We are not Europeans, how can we be?
Europe is miles away over the sea
We're the English from England, let's all be proud
Stand up and be counted- Shout it out loud.
Let's tell our Government and Brussels too
We're proud of our heritage and the Red, White and Blue
Fly the flag of Saint George or the Union Jack
Let the world know - we want OUR ENGLAND BACK !!!!
H/T Liz B
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The most important car for 100 years acccording to James May......
...the Fuel Cell powered Honda FCX Clarity. You even get a glimpse at Jay Leno's car collection.
The next time you see a little old lady with shaky hands, you'll remember this story.
A little old lady, well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door of a sex shop. Obviously very unstable on her feet, she wobbles the few feet across the store to the counter.
Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, stuttering she askes the sales clerk: 'Dddooo youuuu hhhave ddddiillldosss?'
The clerk, politely trying not to burst out laughing replies 'Yes we do have dildos. Actually we carry many different models.'
The old lady then asks: 'Ddddoooo yyyouuuu cccarrry aaa pppinnkk oonnee, ttteeennn iincches lllong aaanndd aabbbooouutt ttwwoo iincchess tthiicck…aaand rruuns bbby bbbaatteerrieees s?'
The clerk responds: 'Yes we do.'
She asks: 'Ddddooo yyyoouuu kknnooww hhhooww tttooo ttuuurrnn tthhe sssunnoffaaabbii ttch offff?
H/T Don Emslie
News...
Sovietizing the Economy: The Final Phase. from Prolibertate
House prices to crash 30% by end of next year, warns Barclays boss. Don't you just love an optimist!!
These cowards won't defeat us: Commander's contempt for Taliban who used child bomber to kill Royal Marines. Good man.
After 130 years of fundraising, Sally Army told to stop rattling collecting tins because it might 'offend other religions'. Oh for f**ks sake.
We will not prop up plummeting pound, say ministers. They have lost control of the economy, actually I am not sure they ever had control.
Shoes thrown at George Bush during surprise farewell visit to Iraq. He should have caught one and sent it back with interest.
Former Defence chiefs accuse Government of 'failing' Armed Forces. Talk about stating the bleeding obvious. The MoD are also to blame for not standing up to the government and protecting their cosy little REMF jobs. We do not need a ministry for the military. They are more than capable of looking after themselves.
Old Etonian becomes Thailand's new prime minister. Bloody Etonians get everywhere.
Britain faces humiliating Iraq withdrawal. Only according to the idiots of the British Liberal Media who have done everything to undermine our troops in Iraq.
North and South split as US battles to save GM, Chrysler and Ford. The unions finished the British Car industry and could do the same for the US.
The various benefits of Fruit and Veg....as long as they are accompanied by large quantities of meat.
Click to enlarge
H/T Peter Gunn
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