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Only 1 in 10 Europeans see US as an ally — study
52 minutes ago
Sunday, 16 November 2008
The Sunday Best....
Inmate escapes German jail in box. DHL will take anything these days.
Islamist rebels whip 32 dancers in Somalia. Islam the 'peaceful religion'.
The traitor in a headscarf: How Czech spy Agent Hammer worked secretly inside Parliament for years. No surprises. In the days of the cold war many Labour MP's were pro-Soviet.
'The Madam found fault with every single thing' - worker tells of 'nightmare' of working for Janet Boateng. I suspect the White House staff are about to suffer in the same way at the hands on Mrs Obama.
Gordon Brown's £1,000 Christmas present to poor families hit by the credit crunch. And where is all this money conning from and will the pensioners get any. My bet is that it will go to potential Labour supporters.
Serious violent crime is going up NOT down, Home Office chief admits. No S**t. Until we restore the death penalty, hard labour and abolish parole criminals will continue to thrive.
After five years, the first arrest in the Redcaps murder case. We should have wiped the village off the face of the earth when it happened.
Ministers tell councils to push contraceptive jabs and implants for 13 year olds! Just exactly what are parents teaching their children these days.
Hillary Clinton would face tough questions about Bill's finances if chosen for Secretary of State. The Clintons finances should be investigated anyway. As should Tony Blair's.
Iraqis accused of murdering British troops get thousands of pounds in legal aid. Britain is so f**ked up. That's what happens when you let lawyers and their cronies run a country.
500,000 deer must be culled to protect countryside from damage by herds. Venison anyone? The carcasses will probably be destroyed and the meat will go to waste.
Morale is damaged, head of Army is told. Hardly surprising. Labour hate the military and have done nothing to improve our military. Their cuts have left the military way too short of men and equipment.
Limo 'tank' shields PM from Al-Qaeda. Who is going to protect him from the British public?
Young Tibetans ‘will resist China with blood’. Now is the time to put pressure on China to get out of Tibet. There economy is slowing and they are economically vulnerable. Not to mention the 1 billion peasants who are still living in rural poverty and are none too happy about it.
‘Robin Hood’ dishes out Nato booty. Find him and kill him.
the Clarkypoos bit..
The daddy of all idiots at your child’s school sports day.
Audi RS6 Avant.
and James May
There's no need to reinvent the wheel.
A little Irish Humour......
Paddy & Mick go to London to donate sperm. It was a disaster! Paddy missed the tube & Mick came on the bus!!
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Paddy calls Easyjet to book a flight. The operator asks 'How many people are flying with you?'
Paddy replies 'I don't know! Its your f***ing plane!!'
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Two Irish couples decided to swap partners for the night. After 3 hours of amazing sex Paddy says 'I wonder how the girls are getting on'
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Paddy takes his new wife to bed on their wedding night. She undresses & lies on the bed spread-eagled & says 'You know what I want don't you?'
'Yeah,' says Paddy. 'The whole friggin bed by the looks of it!'
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Paddy the electrician got sacked from the U.S. prison service for not servicing the electric chair. He said in his professional opinion it was a death trap!
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Paddy, the Irish boyfriend of the woman who's head was found on Arbroath beach was asked to identify her. A detective held up the head to which point Paddy said 'I don't think that's her, she wasn't that tall!'
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An Irishman is shagging a Jewish girl & says 'You're not very tight for a Jew!'
She says 'Well you're not very thick for a Paddy!'
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Paddy is said to be shocked at finding out all his cows have Bluetongue.
'Be Jeysus!' he said, 'I didnt even know they had mobile phones!'
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Mick & Paddy are reading head stones at a nearby cemetery. Mick says 'Crikey! Theres a bloke here who was 152!'
Paddy says 'Whats his name?'
Mick replies 'Miles from London!'
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An Irishman is rowing his boat in a field of hay. Paddy drives past & stops. He looks at the Irishman in the boat & shouts 'Its thick fu**wits like you that give us Irish a bad name! I'd come over there & kick the s**t out of you if I could swim!'
H/T M Kohl
Saturday, 15 November 2008
Global Domination Theo Style....
...that's hits from 148 countries in the last month. The internet is truly amazing.
Ducks are getting crafty....
My father used to pick me up from school at 4am, we would go down to Blakeney marshes for the morning flight and would be back at school for breakfast. Nothing like a flask of cocoa laced with scotch to keep you warm and liven up the morning classes.
H/T
Maggie's Farm
Things You Hear on a Golf Course...
Look at the size of his putter.
Oh, dam, my shaft’s all bent.
After 18 holes I can barely walk.
My hands are so sweaty I can’t get a good grip.
Lift your head and spread your legs.
You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired.
Just turn your back and drop it.
Hold up. I’ve got to wash my balls.
Damn, I missed the hole again.
H/T DML
News...
Why Europe is secretly afraid of a socialist America. And why our enemies have big grins. The West's biggest enemy is the liberal/socialist cabals that have taken control of or media and institutions. Until this cancer is cut out Western civilisation will continue to decline.
Gordon Brown risks 'collapse of sterling' says George Osborne. Brown must go, NOW.
Al-Qaeda's influence is spreading, says CIA chief. We ignore Africa at our peril.
Row over British plan for labelling 'illegal' Israeli vegetables. Utter garbage. I will buy them when I see them.
Judge orders girl to write apology for killing HMS Belfast's cat. Keelhaul the little bitch. And why can't scum like this be named?
Barack Obama is warned to beware of a ‘huge threat’ from al-Qaeda. They know that he hasn't the balls for the job.
Over 250,000 displaced as sexual violence erupts in DRC. More butchery. Africa was much better under white rule.
Saving car giants will cause havoc, Gordon Brown warns US. What does he know. Bulking up the public sector with union non-jobs has caused havoc over here so he can hardly talk. At least the US still has a motor industry. The unions destroyed ours.
RAF exercise over Iceland is cancelled. And the Russians will take full advantage.
Nicolas Sarkozy calls for rethink over US missile defence system in Europe. F**k Iran etc. We need missile defence to protect us from the Russians. If you hadn't noticed the Cold War is on the way back.
White guilt? Done; over; history. I wasn't aware we were supposed to be feeling guilty!
Christmas Lights Challenge......
...beat this! Ok it's early but over here we are in full Christmas mode. The shops and TV have been full of Christmas stuff and adverts since Nov 1. Personally I think all Christmas ads and paraphernalia should be banned before Dec 1. Also the whole lights think works well in North America where there is snow in the UK it is just crass.
H/T Pete Hurrell
WHO SAID POETRY IS BORING?
THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION
ASKING FOR A TWO-LINE RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE,AND THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:
1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you has screwed up my life.
2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.
3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.
4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.
5. I thought that I could love no other--
that is until I met your brother.
6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl'sempty and so
is your head.
7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take that paper bag off your face.
8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
9. My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to hell.'
11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
H/T Nebraska Bob
Friday, 14 November 2008
Vampire Killing Kit....
This 200-year-old vampire killing kit was recently sold at an auction in Natchez, Mississippi. The winning bid? $14,850! The lucky bidder is rumoured to be one WJ Clinton.
H/T DML
News...
Taleban vow to win Afghan fight. What again. They keep threatening it.
Dems Target Private Retirement Accounts. Typical Socialist Policy. Brown has taxed the s**t out of Britains Pension Funds.
Leading Psychiatrist Says Liberalism is a Psychological Disorder. Something we have all known for ages.
Ascot and luxury foreign trips - a portrait of Haringey's head of children's services. Sack the useless bitch.
Prisoner branded one of Britain's most dangerous men escapes from guards while shopping in Aldi supermarket. WTF!!! Since when do prisoners get shopping trips.
20,000 migrant workers register for London Olympics jobs - despite pledge to provide work for local people. Nothing about the Olympics will be as promised, especially the Budget.
Paul Boateng's wife investigated for alleged bullying of domestic staff. Nothing would surprise me. Boateng is a revolting specimen.
Outrage as school fails to observe poppy day silence - because it would disrupt classes. Sack the head teacher.
Ministers must not resort to 'cheap options' on defence, says British Army chief. They have been for years. Defence has been shredded to pay for all Brown's nonjobs in the public sector. Obama will probably do the same.
US drones fire missiles into Pakistan. Hit the Terrorists where they feel safe.
Starving Zimbabweans raid food lorries. The only way to end the suffering is to send in troops to wipe Mugabe and his cronies out. I wonder if Obama will do anything to save fellow Africans.
Piracy gets a shot across the bows. Let's see how many other navies will take the aggressive action needed to stop it.
Double-decker graves to tackle lack of burial space. Nothing is sacred. Wouldn't be surprised if the families are sent the bill for reburying they dead.
Taliban calls on human rights groups to stop executions. They can f**king talk.
Hillary Clinton tipped to be new Secretary of State. 'Keep your friends close and your enemies closer still.'
A Thought.....
I was sitting here thinking during lunch and this thought struck me ……
After all that time and money spent during the election what actually was the outcome? ……
Another black family living in government housing!
H/T DML
A man owned a small farm in Norfolk...
The Department of Employment claimed he was not paying proper wages to his staff and sent a representative out to interview him.
'I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,' demanded the rep.
'Well,' replied the farmer, 'there's my farm hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him £200 a week plus free room and board.
The cook/housekeeper has been here for 18 months, and I pay her £150 per week plus free room and board.
Then there's the half-wit. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about £10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of whiskey every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.'
'That's the guy I want to talk to...the half-wit,' says the agent.
'That would be me,' replied the farmer.
H/Ts Paul H & Shelly
Thursday, 13 November 2008
Understanding Engineers...
What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons and civil engineers build targets.
H/T DML
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